The Phone Call

This post below was originally wrote on November 18, 2019, five years ago today. You’ll see how I mention that “I’ll be in touch” at the end of the post. Well, I didn’t follow through. After Felica’s diagnosis, she was scheduled for several sessions of chemo, which I drove her to, and stayed with her during these sessions. My youngest daughter, Jessica, fitted her with her cap that helped prevent hair loss, when she couldn’t be there, I did the best I could.

COVID hit full blast in early March of 2020 and I was no longer able to sit with her in the hospital during her treatments. I couldn’t go in to her Doctor’s office during for her appointments either. You all know how this all went down. She had to be alone during her mastectomy and the recovery afterwards. COVID, like with others, changed my momentum on a lot of things, including following up on Felica with my posts. Since then, time just flew, and I’m putting myself back into things.

This coming May of 2025, we’ll be celebrating her last chemo treatment and being cancer free for five years! I pray this stays on course forever going forward. It’s not been decided yet how we’re going to celebrate, we’ll be discussing that over Thanksgiving. A cruise has been suggested, good idea, but we’ll be talking about it then.

Back to the chemo treatments. On her last treatment, the social distancing crap and isolation was starting to lighten up and people were starting to engage with each other . Please go to Youtube.com and search “Felicia Last day of Chemo” (her name is actually spelled Felica, but this is how it is on Youtube). There are two Felicia last chemo videos, be Sure to to the one created 4 years ago by discover faith Church.

Please read this post again. Please take some time and thank the Lord for your family and friends and for everything you have been blessed with. Our family was sent into a very dark and scary time for awhile. This, and any tragic situation can happen to anyof us at any given moment.

Thank you, count your blessings!

In February of this year, my oldest daughter Felica split away from her son Kaiden’s dad and they both moved into the two spare bedrooms my wife Cheri and me had been using for other space since becoming empty nesters. It was an adjustment, one we were kind of excited to make, having a little action back in the house with our four year old grand boy. The transition was working out very well, we realized though how out of practice we were having a little one around pretty much full time now. It was going to be good.

A little over a month ago Felica told Cheri and me while we were hanging out in the family room that she was off to her appointment and would be back in a while. “what appointment do you have?” I asked. “A doctor’s appointment“. The answer was matter of fact with a delivery of “that’s all you need to know”. I looked at her mom who gave me a knowing look and quickly turned back to the t.v. Felica’s son was with his dad that night and as I shrugged it off, I remember how quiet the house seemed that night. I looked back at Cheri and her gaze remained fixed on the t.v., making sure she didn’t look back. About an hour and a half later Felica was back home and as she came down the stairs of our bi-level and rounded the corner into her room, I asked “how’d the doctor go?” Her reply was a quick “good”. Into the shower she went, got dressed, out the door again with a “going to Raina’s for the night” as the door firmly shut. Not saying a word, Cheri was still on course with the tube.

The next morning when we were up having our cup of mud, I asked Cheri what the doctor appointment was all about. “Felica found a lump awhile ago, it’s bigger now and she got it looked at”. I stared at the floor a bit, looked at Cheri and said “well, she’s smart to get it looked at, but she’s only twenty nine, I’m sure it’s a minor thing, probably a cyst”. That evening Felica told us that a mammogram appointment needed to be made but she didn’t seem to be concerned about it, she just told us that the doctor didn’t like the looks of it and it should be checked out. A week or so later she was in for her mammogram. The results were sent to her doctor stating simply a “suspicious bump”. That bit of news along with the specialist telling Felica that with her age and the condition of the lump, he was very concerned and recommended to her and her doctor that a biopsy be performed right away. Felica was told that the results of the biopsy will be provided to her doctor within two days after it’s performed. Now Felica was rattled, so was I when she came home with the news. All of the “what ifs” rolled through my mind at once. Instantly I was sucked into the forbidden zone of Google. I had to see what the odds were of her having cancer at that age. One site claimed only four percent of women under forty get breast cancer, another said two percent, another yet said seven percent. Good odds, she’s fine. I shared that information with Felica and Cheri and they both seemed to relax a bit.

November twelfth Felica was in for the biopsy accompanied by Cheri and her friend and coworker, Raina. That evening when I came home from work, I told her “it’s going to be good news”. “I know” was her reply. One tense day went by without any word and on the second morning, which was last Thursday the fourteenth, as Felica was getting ready for her job and I getting ready for mine, I told her “you’ll hear today, it’s going to be good news”. Again, her reply was “I know”. I kept as busy at work as I could to keep my mind off of the biopsy and everything else with it. I was at my desk looking over some reports and results that still needed to be reported when my phone rang. I blindly picked it up and answered with my eyes still on my computer screen, “Rod, it’s Raina…..” my heart dropped a foot. “Felica just got a call from her doctor, it’s breast cancer….” I lost it, my head spun, I couldn’t speak. Raina handed the phone to Felica, crying she just said “I’m so scared dad”. “Me too, I love you” was all I could get out. Raina took the phone back, “I’m taking her home now”. “I’ll be heading out now too” I replied. While driving home, an avalanche of thoughts raced at me at once, “what about Kaiden?, am I going to lose my baby girl?, maybe it’s a mistake, what about Kaiden?, maybe it’s early and fixable, she’ll be o.k., she’s only twenty nine, what about Kaiden?…..” The drive home was forever. Felica was already there with Raina and Felica was on the phone with her doctor when I walked in. An MRI to determine the stage, size and if it’s in the lymph nodes yet was already scheduled for the next day. While she was on the phone, I went upstairs to try to think and Cheri was also home at that time and she followed me up. We just looked at each other and broke down. Cheri never held onto me so tight as she did that day.

Cheri and me drove Felica to her MRI appointment and we were met there by our youngest daughter Jessica. The process took a little over an hour and Felica was told since the radiologist wasn’t on site, the results would be sent to her doctor. “Just great, more hurry up and wait….” That evening as the three of us were just sitting around pretending to watch the tube, still feeling shocked, but now starting to feel drained, Felica’s phone rang. It was her doctor already. Felica put it on speaker. “I have the MRI results…..” The results showed the tumor at four centimeters and that it has not yet spread to the lymph nodes. A big sigh of some relief. The stage of it however will be determined by the surgeons when they remove some of the lymph node during surgery to analyze for sure if the cancer is not in there. Felica’s doctor already scheduled an appointment to consult with a surgeon on Tuesday the nineteenth.

Felica’s been upbeat and positive since the call from her doctor. Yesterday her and I went to a grocery store called Sprouts to buy some vegetables she’s putting together to start cleansing. She will meet with a dietitian to plan a proper eating strategy that she knows will be forever. Things are changing for all of us. While at the store, Felica looked at me and said to me “it’s on dad, I’m beating this and it’ll be permanent!” I believe her, I can see it and feel it. Since that phone call last Thursday, the support from people through phone calls and text messages offering prayer and support have been phenomenal. As I write this I’m looking at the flowers that have arrived from people with well wishes. It’s been awesome.

Felica has Picked up Her Jawbone, and she’s ready to FIGHT LIKE A GIRL!! I’ll be in touch.

Pick Up Your Jawbone. Slay Your Philistines!